笑话收集

收集笑话, 有的时候和外国人交流的时候，经常需要讲一些笑话，但是脑子里很少能立刻想到几个，在这记录一些。

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• 民主是一种很复杂的东西， 复杂到这是中国人 唯一没能山寨成功的东西。
  • Democracy is a very complicated thing, so complicated that it is the only thing that the Chinese have not been able to copy.
• 一位年轻人在工作时抱怨道：“这种政府真差劲儿！！！！！”结果被一位警察听到而遭逮捕。年轻人辩解说：“我根本没讲是哪个政府，你怎么可以随便逮捕我呢？”" 你少骗人，”警察咆哮道，“我在这里工作二十多年了，哪一个政府差劲我不会知道吗？”
  • A young man complained at work, "This kind of government sucks!!!!" and was arrested by a police officer. The young man defended: "I didn't say which government it was, how could you arrest me casually?" "You don't lie," the policeman smiled, "I've worked here for more than 20 years, which government is bad，should I not know?"
• 勃列日涅夫在路上看到一个人扛着西瓜回家。他停下车，招呼那人，要那人把西瓜卖给他。“好吧，勃列日涅夫同志。”那人说，“您选一个吧。”,“可只有一个西瓜啊。”,“我们选您的时候就是这样。
  • On the road, Brezhnev saw a man carrying a watermelon home. He stopped the car and greeted the man, asking him to sell him the watermelon. "Okay, Comrade Brezhnev." The man said, "You choose one.", "But there is only one watermelon.", "That's how we chose you.
• 问：苏联入侵捷克斯洛伐克是为了什么？答：为了寻找邀请他们介入的捷克斯洛伐克人民。
  • Q: What was the purpose of the Soviet Union's invasion of Czechoslovakia? A: To find the Czechoslovakian people who invited them to intervene.
• 两个东德人民站在柏林墙附近聊天。一个问：“你觉得我们的政权如何？”另一个回答说：“和你的看法一样。”“这样的话，我就有责任逮捕你！”
  • Two East German people chatting while standing near the Berlin Wall. One asked, "What do you think of our regime?" The other replied, "Same opinion as you." "In that case, I'll be responsible for arresting you!"